We get involved in beautiful things in the world, believing that’s going to last and that’s reality. We get involved in ugly things in the world, and we want to get rid of those ugly things, and change them into beautiful things. We’re so involved in the world, we have no time to think of reality.
Unfortunately it is only when a catastrophe comes along, like a death, or a sickness, or a severance from family for some reason or another, that we begin to question, “What is life all about? I’m born, I die, and in between I struggle, trying to achieve happiness. And when I achieve it, it’s not what I thought it was. What is reality? What is life?”
As you make the request known to yourself, something happens. You find a book. You find a friend that is, perhaps, a few steps higher than you. You begin to ask questions. You begin to read. And then you begin to understand that there is something else besides being born, going to school, getting a job, having a family, getting old, retiring, and dying. Life is more meaningful. But yet you say, “I have not tasted this. I only know my humanhood.”
If you continue being sincere, you will be led to a teacher, or perhaps a river, perhaps a tree, something that you can focus on, and you will begin to go deep within yourself. I don’t like to use the term meditation, because it’s been so misused. You begin to dive deep within yourself. You start to experience feelings you never had before. You have moments of bliss, but they go away, and you’re back to your old self. You start to think more about life, what it’s all about.
Then one day something happens to you. You begin to realize that it is your thinking that has caused you the problems to begin with, the illusion, the maya. It is your thoughts that are the problem. You ponder this. The guru within you has been awakened. Because of your sincerity, because of your wanting to awaken more than anything else in the world, the guru within you leads you to an outer guru that has gone farther than you. And the outer guru tells you the personal self is only a thought, an idea. It is called the “I-thought.” You must follow the I to its source…. As you abide in the I, it will turn into your Self, which is consciousness, absolute reality…
This is only the beginning…